Touching

Guess what was on the morning news this morning? The results of a number of scientific studies now prove that human touch is good for us! A gentle touch on someone’s arm can calm them during a stressful moment. A hug is better than medication. A shoulder to cry on is better than a therapy session. And a shoulder massage can make the whole miserable week bearable.


They have actually been able to show that touch lowers the heart rate and breathing rate. It also counters the stress substances our body sends out with another substance that our brain sends out in response to touch.

I think most of us know this instinctively. We soothe babies with touch. We fix boo-boos with kisses. We welcome strangers and friends alike with a warm handshake. We touch coma victims.

I just read about a man pulling a young woman out of a burning car. She had extensive injuries. He couldn’t do much for her while waiting for help but in his own words, “I kept my hand on her shoulder so she would know she was not alone.”

At the time of my first husband’s death, I needed to buy a shirt for him to be buried in. Not used to buying men’s dress shirts, my best friend’s husband went with me to the local mall. It was two weeks before Christmas. The mall was teeming with shoppers. I was overwhelmed by my feelings of vulnerability. I clung to his arm like a little girl. It kept me grounded.

Several of my childbirths were difficult. Again, it was my husband’s touch that kept me grounded. During one particular birth, I could not hear or acknowledge anyone around me but I felt his hand on my back. It was something to focus on.

I am a toucher by nature. I have been known to give perfect strangers an arm touch or a hug. I have noticed over the years that some of us have become so used to NOT touching that it has become uncomfortable. I have learned to ask for permission first. I had begun to think maybe it wasn’t worth doing anymore.

But this morning news report has changed that. I will keep touching. Maybe if more of us begin to “reach out and touch someone”, some of the anger we see all around us will diminish and smiles may appear. Hey, we have science on our side.

That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?