JUDGE-verb: to come to a conclusion by way of reasoning, to decide, to examine and pass sentence on. Over time, we have been cautioned to “judge not, that ye may not be judged”, “walk a mile in another’s shoes”, “judge ye righteously that ye may also be judged righteously”, “live awhile in someone else’s skin” and a variety of other sayings all telling us to be sure to get all the information before we “pass sentence” on someone else.
And yet, we continue to think we know all about the people around us and why they do whatever it is they do. We don’t ask questions, we don’t imagine what the motivation might be, we don’t seem to cut anyone any slack any more. Except ourselves!! We have every reason in the book to justify our behaviors but we turn around and condemn those very same behaviors in others. I don’t get it! I really don’t!
I often wonder as I see someone with a long list of “wrongs” that others have done if they would like the list of their “wrongs” pulled out and waved in their faces? Do they think they have never committed any hurts? It seems to me that these people really do think that they have never done anything offensive to anyone! That is impossible.
I’m beginning to think the whole world gets up everyday to be angry. Whatever happened to understanding, tolerance, letting go and forgiveness? These traits have disappeared. We are humans. We are not perfect. We will hurt one another. We ALL will at sometime. Don’t we want forgiveness and understanding towards ourselves for our mistakes? We MUST give the same consideration to others.
We will never find peace as individuals, as families, as nations, etc. until we can learn these basic principles. Remember the Serenity Prayer? “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change: Courage to change the things I can: and wisdom to know the difference.” Learn it- live it.
We are so quick to take offense. A very wise man said once, “If you say something in a non offensive way and someone is offended by it, it’s not your problem, it’s theirs.” I was reminded of this in my last job. One day, I received an e-mail telling me that my e-mails were too long and chatty. I started making sure I was business like and to the point. Then I received an e-mail from another person in that same office that informed me that my e-mails were rude!
I have the following in a frame on my wall- “Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape.” Amen!! That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Friday, April 29, 2011
Monday, April 25, 2011
Redneck Humor
My family has always enjoyed “redneck” humor. Foxworthy and the gang are some of our favorite comedians. Their stories are relevant to country folk everywhere. It wasn’t until my husband and I travelled through some of the “redneck” states that we realized how true to life the jokes are. We even came up with a few of our own.
One road we travelled took us through a number of one horse towns. Population was in the double digits and homes were few and far between. What caught our attention was that each town had at least three churches. Most often the churches were built almost side by side. “You know you’re in redneck territory when each family has its own church!”
Driving through the Ozarks, we were looking for a truckstop to spend the night at. Our truckers manual told us of one at the top of the mountain. It was rated with 4 stars. This meant a full service stop- toilets, restaurant, showers, shopping, large overnight parking lot, etc. It was late at night when we found it. I’m telling the truth- the parking lot was a potholed dirt field, the toilet that I used was falling through the rotten floor, (I held on to the wall for dear life) the men’s room was not working at all, a sign said to use the shower room, (I asked my husband- there was no toilet, he actually had to pee in the shower stall), the restaurant was a fat lady with a griddle and shopping was nonexistent. As I snuggled into bed, I wondered aloud about what a 3 star stop would look like. My husband replied, “The outhouse in the back!”
As we drove down one road, I noticed mounds of dirt by the side of the road. They were obviously made by some sort of animal. These piles were along the road for miles. I didn’t know if they were made by gophers or prairie dogs or moles. I finally asked out loud, “I wonder what the people call the animals that make these piles.” Without skipping a beat, he replied, “Dinner.”
Along a main highway in Arkansas, we passed a swampy area along the side of the road. Next to the swamp was an old couch and chair that may have fallen out of a truck but someone had positioned them towards the swamp like living room furniture. I said, “Look, Brent, it’s a redneck rest area!”
And the people we came across- they seemed like characters out of a movie. But they were staring at us as hard as we were looking at them so I’m thinking we looked the same to them. Isn’t it great that we are all so different? If only so comedians can make a living.
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
One road we travelled took us through a number of one horse towns. Population was in the double digits and homes were few and far between. What caught our attention was that each town had at least three churches. Most often the churches were built almost side by side. “You know you’re in redneck territory when each family has its own church!”
Driving through the Ozarks, we were looking for a truckstop to spend the night at. Our truckers manual told us of one at the top of the mountain. It was rated with 4 stars. This meant a full service stop- toilets, restaurant, showers, shopping, large overnight parking lot, etc. It was late at night when we found it. I’m telling the truth- the parking lot was a potholed dirt field, the toilet that I used was falling through the rotten floor, (I held on to the wall for dear life) the men’s room was not working at all, a sign said to use the shower room, (I asked my husband- there was no toilet, he actually had to pee in the shower stall), the restaurant was a fat lady with a griddle and shopping was nonexistent. As I snuggled into bed, I wondered aloud about what a 3 star stop would look like. My husband replied, “The outhouse in the back!”
As we drove down one road, I noticed mounds of dirt by the side of the road. They were obviously made by some sort of animal. These piles were along the road for miles. I didn’t know if they were made by gophers or prairie dogs or moles. I finally asked out loud, “I wonder what the people call the animals that make these piles.” Without skipping a beat, he replied, “Dinner.”
Along a main highway in Arkansas, we passed a swampy area along the side of the road. Next to the swamp was an old couch and chair that may have fallen out of a truck but someone had positioned them towards the swamp like living room furniture. I said, “Look, Brent, it’s a redneck rest area!”
And the people we came across- they seemed like characters out of a movie. But they were staring at us as hard as we were looking at them so I’m thinking we looked the same to them. Isn’t it great that we are all so different? If only so comedians can make a living.
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
R U a phoneaholic?
“Hi, I’m Kathy. I’m a phoneaholic. I have been cellphone free for almost 6 months.” OK, I realize that the phoneaholics that are reading this are probably in the middle of an anxiety attack. Breathe deep, again, I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this but it IS possible to live in today’s world without a cell. Sometimes, it’s even preferable.
You might ask how did I come to such a conclusion? I’ll tell you. Firstly, we were saving money. I found out that most companies will let you put your phones on hold for several months. No service but also no bills. We did this. The first few weeks were difficult. We found ourselves reaching for our phones many times a day. But as is the case with all withdrawals, it grew easier and easier. We found ourselves liking the peace and quiet in the car, in the garden, while shopping. I found my meditation time again.
We also found quality couple time. During the aforementioned times, we talked to each other, not others. We found ourselves listening to each other instead of for the text alert. I’m beginning to think that turning off has added a whole new emotional intimacy to our lives. Instead of telling Mom and other friends about his day at work, my husband now tells me. That applies to me as well.
I am also wondering if “instant communication” leads to “instant” arguments, fights and breakups. We found that instead of being able to call each other when we are upset or aggravated- we have to wait until we see each other again. By then, we have forgotten about the problem or solved it ourselves. Peace reigns supreme!
We feel that of all the changes we’ve made in our lives recently, this one choice took us directly out of the fast lane. Not being available 24/7 has made a huge difference in our relationship as well as other relationships. Instead of a lot of meaningless short talks with people, we have real conversations in person or on our land line. We cherish our calls more.
Children actually have to think for themselves if they can’t call Mom and Dad every 15 minutes. They will manage to not kill each other, I promise. And you won’t know every little thing happening at home while you are away- isn’t that worth it?
Recently I was at a store. There was a woman whose phone just rang continuously. By the 4th call, she was perturbed and told her husband she couldn’t remember who she had already talked to. She said that she hated her phone!
I murmured that was the exact reason I didn’t have a phone anymore. This sparked a lively conversation with a nearby couple who had been thinking of doing the same thing and wanted details about what life after cellphones was like. I think more of us should do it! At least try it- you might like it. We do!
That’s the view from my side of street, what’s yours?
You might ask how did I come to such a conclusion? I’ll tell you. Firstly, we were saving money. I found out that most companies will let you put your phones on hold for several months. No service but also no bills. We did this. The first few weeks were difficult. We found ourselves reaching for our phones many times a day. But as is the case with all withdrawals, it grew easier and easier. We found ourselves liking the peace and quiet in the car, in the garden, while shopping. I found my meditation time again.
We also found quality couple time. During the aforementioned times, we talked to each other, not others. We found ourselves listening to each other instead of for the text alert. I’m beginning to think that turning off has added a whole new emotional intimacy to our lives. Instead of telling Mom and other friends about his day at work, my husband now tells me. That applies to me as well.
I am also wondering if “instant communication” leads to “instant” arguments, fights and breakups. We found that instead of being able to call each other when we are upset or aggravated- we have to wait until we see each other again. By then, we have forgotten about the problem or solved it ourselves. Peace reigns supreme!
We feel that of all the changes we’ve made in our lives recently, this one choice took us directly out of the fast lane. Not being available 24/7 has made a huge difference in our relationship as well as other relationships. Instead of a lot of meaningless short talks with people, we have real conversations in person or on our land line. We cherish our calls more.
Children actually have to think for themselves if they can’t call Mom and Dad every 15 minutes. They will manage to not kill each other, I promise. And you won’t know every little thing happening at home while you are away- isn’t that worth it?
Recently I was at a store. There was a woman whose phone just rang continuously. By the 4th call, she was perturbed and told her husband she couldn’t remember who she had already talked to. She said that she hated her phone!
I murmured that was the exact reason I didn’t have a phone anymore. This sparked a lively conversation with a nearby couple who had been thinking of doing the same thing and wanted details about what life after cellphones was like. I think more of us should do it! At least try it- you might like it. We do!
That’s the view from my side of street, what’s yours?
Monday, April 18, 2011
We need a hero
Heroes are not born. They are made. No, not made but grown- the decision to be a hero or not does not happen at the scene of the heroism. There is no thinking time at that moment. There is only reaction time. Ask anyone who has been in such a situation.
Listen to the “heroes” afterwards. They tell you they are not heroes. They’ll tell you that they did what anyone would have done. But not everyone would have. Only those who have made choices throughout their lives to act for the good of others can react in a time of crisis and be a hero.
Those who have spent their lives taking care of themselves first do what is natural for them. They run away. Some catch themselves and come back. Some don’t.
I’ve been thinking about the heroes that have touched my heart during my lifetime. I don’t know any of them but they have had a profound effect on me. It’s hard to pick just a few especially since 9/11 showed us hundreds but here are my most memorable heroes. They are in no particular order.
The people on United 93 who chose to take destiny into their own hands on that fateful September day and crashed the plane them selves rather than allow the terrorists to use them. They forever changed the “victim” mode of hijacked passengers.
Of all the heroic stories coming from that day, this one has stayed with me. Two men worked in the upper stories of one of the Twin Towers. They were best friends. Evacuation down the stairs began as soon as the building was hit. One of these men was in a wheelchair. He could not leave. His friend refused to leave him even when begged to do so by his wheelchair bound friend. They watched the first tower fall. This man was on the phone saying goodbye to his wife when the building they were in collapsed. True friendships as well as family are forever.
In my 20’s, I watched horrified as a plane crashed into the icy Potomac River. Burned in my mind is the image of one man, a passenger, who caught the helicopter life saver and consistently put it around fellow passengers in the water. He did this until succumbing to the cold, he sunk and died. I will never forget watching and weeping at such a selfless action.
My last hero for today I heard about in the Holocaust Museum in Washington, DC. It was told by a survivor who had ridden those dreadful cattle cars with her mother, her sister and her sister’s baby. As they were herded off they saw that the women were being divided. Those with children and the elderly were headed to one place (the gas houses). The middle aged and young women were off to another (the work camps). The middle aged mother quickly realized what was happening and before her daughters knew - she grabbed the baby and pleaded with her daughter convincing her that letting her have the baby would keep her out of the work camps, “You know how bad my back is.” The daughter agreed thinking she was saving her mother not realizing that her mother was saving her. I will never forget this now old woman’s face as she told how her mother’s last words to her were, “Take care of your sister.” This mother sacrificed her life for that of her daughter’s.
We need heroes today. We need to raise up those who can be heroes. We need to make the kinds of choices that would help us react like heroes. We need to remember those who have been heroes. That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Listen to the “heroes” afterwards. They tell you they are not heroes. They’ll tell you that they did what anyone would have done. But not everyone would have. Only those who have made choices throughout their lives to act for the good of others can react in a time of crisis and be a hero.
Those who have spent their lives taking care of themselves first do what is natural for them. They run away. Some catch themselves and come back. Some don’t.
I’ve been thinking about the heroes that have touched my heart during my lifetime. I don’t know any of them but they have had a profound effect on me. It’s hard to pick just a few especially since 9/11 showed us hundreds but here are my most memorable heroes. They are in no particular order.
The people on United 93 who chose to take destiny into their own hands on that fateful September day and crashed the plane them selves rather than allow the terrorists to use them. They forever changed the “victim” mode of hijacked passengers.
Of all the heroic stories coming from that day, this one has stayed with me. Two men worked in the upper stories of one of the Twin Towers. They were best friends. Evacuation down the stairs began as soon as the building was hit. One of these men was in a wheelchair. He could not leave. His friend refused to leave him even when begged to do so by his wheelchair bound friend. They watched the first tower fall. This man was on the phone saying goodbye to his wife when the building they were in collapsed. True friendships as well as family are forever.
In my 20’s, I watched horrified as a plane crashed into the icy Potomac River. Burned in my mind is the image of one man, a passenger, who caught the helicopter life saver and consistently put it around fellow passengers in the water. He did this until succumbing to the cold, he sunk and died. I will never forget watching and weeping at such a selfless action.
My last hero for today I heard about in the Holocaust Museum in Washington, DC. It was told by a survivor who had ridden those dreadful cattle cars with her mother, her sister and her sister’s baby. As they were herded off they saw that the women were being divided. Those with children and the elderly were headed to one place (the gas houses). The middle aged and young women were off to another (the work camps). The middle aged mother quickly realized what was happening and before her daughters knew - she grabbed the baby and pleaded with her daughter convincing her that letting her have the baby would keep her out of the work camps, “You know how bad my back is.” The daughter agreed thinking she was saving her mother not realizing that her mother was saving her. I will never forget this now old woman’s face as she told how her mother’s last words to her were, “Take care of your sister.” This mother sacrificed her life for that of her daughter’s.
We need heroes today. We need to raise up those who can be heroes. We need to make the kinds of choices that would help us react like heroes. We need to remember those who have been heroes. That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Friday, April 15, 2011
Hen Pecked
Those who read my last blog know that we are now the proud owners of chickens. Thirty-three to be exact! We’ve had them for a week and I’m not sure how I lived without them. As any chicken owner will tell you, they are so much fun to watch. I’ve already learned several life lessons from them.
Chickens are an intelligent species. They learn quickly, adapt well and pretty much get the picture without too much effort. They are not, however, thinking, reasoning beings. I’ve learned that there is a huge difference between having intelligent and having the ability to reason.
Let me give you some examples. They have learned that when I have a certain bowl in my hands I have goodies from my kitchen. They begin to get excited as soon as they see it. I put the goodies in their dish- apples, lettuce, bread, etc. A few quick chickens grab some pieces and run. The others all follow. They then begin to steal the pieces from one another -sometimes right out of each others mouths. This shows intelligence. They want what someone else has. If they were thinking beings, they’d realize that there is still a pan full of goodies on the ground!
They have discovered the joys of dirt. They have dug a hole for taking dirt baths in. They dig and scoop and throw dirt all over themselves. They love it. There are two dirt holes for playing in. They show intelligence by crowding around the holes waiting for their turn. They like to follow the crowd. If they were thinkers, they would figure out that the floor of the entire coop is dirt. It’s big enough for them to have their own bath hole!
There is one chicken that can’t make up her mind if she wants to be in the henhouse or in the coop. She goes in to see what’s going on inside and then she comes out to see what’s going on outside. She goes back and forth all day- sometimes just sticking her head out to see or in to see. She wants to be when the action is.
We all know people like that, people who want what others have, people who follow the crowd, people who want to be where the action is. And come to think of it- those people have intelligence. What they are lacking is the ability to think for them selves. They spend their lives running around well, like chickens. Blch, blch, blch……
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Chickens are an intelligent species. They learn quickly, adapt well and pretty much get the picture without too much effort. They are not, however, thinking, reasoning beings. I’ve learned that there is a huge difference between having intelligent and having the ability to reason.
Let me give you some examples. They have learned that when I have a certain bowl in my hands I have goodies from my kitchen. They begin to get excited as soon as they see it. I put the goodies in their dish- apples, lettuce, bread, etc. A few quick chickens grab some pieces and run. The others all follow. They then begin to steal the pieces from one another -sometimes right out of each others mouths. This shows intelligence. They want what someone else has. If they were thinking beings, they’d realize that there is still a pan full of goodies on the ground!
They have discovered the joys of dirt. They have dug a hole for taking dirt baths in. They dig and scoop and throw dirt all over themselves. They love it. There are two dirt holes for playing in. They show intelligence by crowding around the holes waiting for their turn. They like to follow the crowd. If they were thinkers, they would figure out that the floor of the entire coop is dirt. It’s big enough for them to have their own bath hole!
There is one chicken that can’t make up her mind if she wants to be in the henhouse or in the coop. She goes in to see what’s going on inside and then she comes out to see what’s going on outside. She goes back and forth all day- sometimes just sticking her head out to see or in to see. She wants to be when the action is.
We all know people like that, people who want what others have, people who follow the crowd, people who want to be where the action is. And come to think of it- those people have intelligence. What they are lacking is the ability to think for them selves. They spend their lives running around well, like chickens. Blch, blch, blch……
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Chicken Lady vs Rabbit Lady?
My husband and I are starting a small farm. Someone at a local feed store gave us the names of two older women that trying to get out of the business. We contacted these ladies and wow, what a contrast, so much so that I want to share them with you. I will call them “chicken lady” and “rabbit lady”.
The first one we met was “chicken lady”. The only info we had was a small map with directions to her house. We stopped by one late afternoon. We were feeling a little awkward about just dropping in but she was very gracious about it.
Our experience with her was wonderful. She is 78 years old (she definitely did not look it), very active in church and other activities, in reasonably good health and living alone. She was giving up her 33 chickens because she felt she just couldn’t keep up with them anymore. She was a happy, giving, thoughtful woman. We bought her chickens. She gave us everything that went with them, bags of feed, feeders, chicken wire, etc. She kept adding things to the pile saying, “What good is any of this going to do me? You might as well have it all.” She didn’t charge for anything but the chickens although I did give her extra. It didn’t come close to the real worth of what we were getting.
The day we went to pick them up (which will probably be another blog), she insisted on feeding us lunch and was as helpful as she could be. She was so grateful that we were giving her chickens a good home. She thanked God for bringing us all together to be able to help one another. We felt the same way. It was a great experience!
A week later we met “rabbit lady”. We had a number and name this time so we called ahead and made an appointment. We followed her directions and found ourselves pulling into a place covered with junk. Piles of junk were everywhere. There was only one small path from the driveway thru the crowded yard to get to the crowded back porch of a very dilapidated old trailer. I looked at my husband and said, “Don’t count on a good deal here. She is obviously a hoarder.” That turned out to be an understatement!
She came out to meet us barely able to walk. She had no teeth, little hair and was a little dirty. She began complaining the minute we introduced ourselves. She gave us the long list of health problems including a recent surgery and back problems. She was just too old and incapacitated to continue caring for her rabbits. I asked her age- she was 66. We weaved thru the junk piles in the yard to get to her rabbit area of more than 120 rabbits.
She continued to discourse on her difficult life, why she had to get rid of the bunnies, predator attacks, family problems, etc. We began to talk money (something I am very good at). She wanted $30 a rabbit! She could only pick out 10 that she could sell. I pointed to various pieces a junk around the yard- nothing interested her in giving anything up. I asked about a group discount- no deal. But she continued to complain about her situation while she hobbled around the place.
I know which one I want to be like when I grow up, how about you? That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
The first one we met was “chicken lady”. The only info we had was a small map with directions to her house. We stopped by one late afternoon. We were feeling a little awkward about just dropping in but she was very gracious about it.
Our experience with her was wonderful. She is 78 years old (she definitely did not look it), very active in church and other activities, in reasonably good health and living alone. She was giving up her 33 chickens because she felt she just couldn’t keep up with them anymore. She was a happy, giving, thoughtful woman. We bought her chickens. She gave us everything that went with them, bags of feed, feeders, chicken wire, etc. She kept adding things to the pile saying, “What good is any of this going to do me? You might as well have it all.” She didn’t charge for anything but the chickens although I did give her extra. It didn’t come close to the real worth of what we were getting.
The day we went to pick them up (which will probably be another blog), she insisted on feeding us lunch and was as helpful as she could be. She was so grateful that we were giving her chickens a good home. She thanked God for bringing us all together to be able to help one another. We felt the same way. It was a great experience!
A week later we met “rabbit lady”. We had a number and name this time so we called ahead and made an appointment. We followed her directions and found ourselves pulling into a place covered with junk. Piles of junk were everywhere. There was only one small path from the driveway thru the crowded yard to get to the crowded back porch of a very dilapidated old trailer. I looked at my husband and said, “Don’t count on a good deal here. She is obviously a hoarder.” That turned out to be an understatement!
She came out to meet us barely able to walk. She had no teeth, little hair and was a little dirty. She began complaining the minute we introduced ourselves. She gave us the long list of health problems including a recent surgery and back problems. She was just too old and incapacitated to continue caring for her rabbits. I asked her age- she was 66. We weaved thru the junk piles in the yard to get to her rabbit area of more than 120 rabbits.
She continued to discourse on her difficult life, why she had to get rid of the bunnies, predator attacks, family problems, etc. We began to talk money (something I am very good at). She wanted $30 a rabbit! She could only pick out 10 that she could sell. I pointed to various pieces a junk around the yard- nothing interested her in giving anything up. I asked about a group discount- no deal. But she continued to complain about her situation while she hobbled around the place.
I know which one I want to be like when I grow up, how about you? That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Monday, April 11, 2011
Cats and dogs
We met a delightful older woman last week. While there we found ourselves in the age old discussion of cats versus dogs. She was a vehement dog person with a Siamese cat. Of course, we wanted to hear the story behind it.
The cat belonged to her late husband. Over the years her dog companions have passed away but the cat still remains. Their relationship resembles that of two crotchety old ladies who put up with each other for conveniences’ sake. They tolerate one another.
My husband swears that he is not a cat person but I’ve seen him with our cats and kittens so I don’t buy that line anymore. He is so lovingly concerned about their well- being. He also never misses a chance to pet or cuddle with them. I have one picture of him taking a nap with five kittens all over him. I’m the one who finally banned them to the great outdoors when the cat box wars could not be resolved!
I’ve never claimed to be one or the other. I’m an animal person. I love them all. If I had to choose, I think I’d say I’m a dog person. I can live without cats if I have to but living without a dog is unimaginable. A favorite character from a favorite book puts it like this, “A cat can be a companion but it can never be a best mate like a dog.” I’d have to agree with that.
I feel like I can share my life with my dogs but the only thing I truly share with my cats is my bed and sometimes my lap.
A card I read at a truck stop somewhere in Wyoming said it this way-“ Years ago, cats were worshiped as Gods. Cats have never forgotten that.” Yup, I’d agree with that, too.
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
The cat belonged to her late husband. Over the years her dog companions have passed away but the cat still remains. Their relationship resembles that of two crotchety old ladies who put up with each other for conveniences’ sake. They tolerate one another.
My husband swears that he is not a cat person but I’ve seen him with our cats and kittens so I don’t buy that line anymore. He is so lovingly concerned about their well- being. He also never misses a chance to pet or cuddle with them. I have one picture of him taking a nap with five kittens all over him. I’m the one who finally banned them to the great outdoors when the cat box wars could not be resolved!
I’ve never claimed to be one or the other. I’m an animal person. I love them all. If I had to choose, I think I’d say I’m a dog person. I can live without cats if I have to but living without a dog is unimaginable. A favorite character from a favorite book puts it like this, “A cat can be a companion but it can never be a best mate like a dog.” I’d have to agree with that.
I feel like I can share my life with my dogs but the only thing I truly share with my cats is my bed and sometimes my lap.
A card I read at a truck stop somewhere in Wyoming said it this way-“ Years ago, cats were worshiped as Gods. Cats have never forgotten that.” Yup, I’d agree with that, too.
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Weather Patterns
About six weeks ago, I began to write a blog that started with “Listen to the rhythm of the falling rain”. We have a tin roof and I had laid in bed that morning enjoying the music of steady rain upon it. It was delightful. It was made all the more so by the fact that rain of any kind but especially steady, heavy rain is rare in these parts!
That was then. Now, I’d be more likely to say, “Damn, is it raining again?” We have had a steady flow of moisture for the past six weeks. I’ve lived in this area for ten years and have NEVER seen such moisture here! There has not been a 24 hour period without rain. This is more like western Oregon and Washington not here in the desert!
It has also been cold! Not the New England cold I used to be accustom to but the cold, damp days I am not used to here in my new part of the world. By now, we usually have our short-sleeved shirts and capris on as well as our flip-flops every day. We are likely to be busy digging and planting in our gardens, swapping plants and enjoying the great spring weather.
Flowers should be popping up all over the place. Temps should be averaging seventy not fifty. I shouldn’t be sitting at my desk wrapped in a comforter as I am at this moment. Where’s Al Gore and global warming when you need it?
It’s also been gloomy and cloudy most of the time. The only exception is when the wind blows the clouds away and we glimpse the sun. I say glimpse because to go out and bask in its light might cause your life to be in danger! Instead of the steady spring winds that normally range between 20-30mph, we are having winds that average 30-60mph.
I know full well that I have nothing really to complain about. No blizzards, earthquakes, hurricanes, or tsunamis threaten us as they do other parts of the world. For the most part, the weather here is mild and pleasant. I’m just thinking that on New Year’s Day 2011, Mother Nature got up on the wrong side of the bed. Do you think a petition might convince her to take a nap?
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
That was then. Now, I’d be more likely to say, “Damn, is it raining again?” We have had a steady flow of moisture for the past six weeks. I’ve lived in this area for ten years and have NEVER seen such moisture here! There has not been a 24 hour period without rain. This is more like western Oregon and Washington not here in the desert!
It has also been cold! Not the New England cold I used to be accustom to but the cold, damp days I am not used to here in my new part of the world. By now, we usually have our short-sleeved shirts and capris on as well as our flip-flops every day. We are likely to be busy digging and planting in our gardens, swapping plants and enjoying the great spring weather.
Flowers should be popping up all over the place. Temps should be averaging seventy not fifty. I shouldn’t be sitting at my desk wrapped in a comforter as I am at this moment. Where’s Al Gore and global warming when you need it?
It’s also been gloomy and cloudy most of the time. The only exception is when the wind blows the clouds away and we glimpse the sun. I say glimpse because to go out and bask in its light might cause your life to be in danger! Instead of the steady spring winds that normally range between 20-30mph, we are having winds that average 30-60mph.
I know full well that I have nothing really to complain about. No blizzards, earthquakes, hurricanes, or tsunamis threaten us as they do other parts of the world. For the most part, the weather here is mild and pleasant. I’m just thinking that on New Year’s Day 2011, Mother Nature got up on the wrong side of the bed. Do you think a petition might convince her to take a nap?
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
Monday, April 4, 2011
Low Income Housing
I managed a low income housing project for a year. It was a huge learning experience on all levels and it gave me a chance to try out some of my long held theories about people. I was thrilled to find that for the most part they worked. I want to share some of these experiments today.
1. Treat people with respect at all times and in all circumstances. I believed it would change attitudes. It did. We saw people begin to hold their heads up, watch their language, be less defensive and combative just because we were respectful of them.
2. Be kind- the old adage that you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar WORKS! In that year, we did not have to go through the eviction process even once. There were a few situations where we gently pointed out that giving us notice and moving out would be in their best interests and they all choose that path.
3. Try to understand the whys behind things and you might be able to solve the problems. One pet peeve of mine was the tendency to threaten tenants with court or other action for things like junk piled up. Most of our tenants were single moms with no vehicles or men available to help them remove the old couch, broken washer, rotten mattress. Why persecute them? We set up quarterly clean up days. We loaded whatever they left at the curb into our pickup and hauled it to the dump. Problem solved- place clean- everyone happy.
4. Beautiful inspires better care. We fixed up and decorated the laundry room including a message board and reading material. We kept it stocked with paper towels and hand soap. Contrary to the popular belief that it would all be stolen- the area had never been kept so clean.
5. Service is contagious. When people moved in or out, they often needed to acquire or get rid of things. We knew who might have or need those things. We started letting other tenants know. Pretty soon, we had a pretty good bartering system going on. We had a spring and fall free yard sale in the hall. Tenants brought things in and took other things home. This helped with cleanup, also.
6. We felt that a strong sense of community would go a long way to solving the petty disagreements that can seem endless. We set up the hall with a donated computer, a tv/vcr, lots of movies, lots of books, some donated exercise equipment and toys for the kids. Once some ground rules were established it became a great place for the normally unsupervised kids to hang out especially in summer. Rarely did we have to intervene with behavior problems.
I held a once a month “Girls Night Out” for the women. We did facials, foot spas, etc. Our tenants spoke 5 different languages but “girly fru-fru” crosses all language barriers.
And it all worked. It was beautiful to see everyone acting as concerned neighbors, looking out for one another and being looked out after. When we left, they threw a party for us and said thanks for the sense of community we had helped established. I left knowing that we had proved that low income doesn’t have to be low class. I wish we all knew that.
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
1. Treat people with respect at all times and in all circumstances. I believed it would change attitudes. It did. We saw people begin to hold their heads up, watch their language, be less defensive and combative just because we were respectful of them.
2. Be kind- the old adage that you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar WORKS! In that year, we did not have to go through the eviction process even once. There were a few situations where we gently pointed out that giving us notice and moving out would be in their best interests and they all choose that path.
3. Try to understand the whys behind things and you might be able to solve the problems. One pet peeve of mine was the tendency to threaten tenants with court or other action for things like junk piled up. Most of our tenants were single moms with no vehicles or men available to help them remove the old couch, broken washer, rotten mattress. Why persecute them? We set up quarterly clean up days. We loaded whatever they left at the curb into our pickup and hauled it to the dump. Problem solved- place clean- everyone happy.
4. Beautiful inspires better care. We fixed up and decorated the laundry room including a message board and reading material. We kept it stocked with paper towels and hand soap. Contrary to the popular belief that it would all be stolen- the area had never been kept so clean.
5. Service is contagious. When people moved in or out, they often needed to acquire or get rid of things. We knew who might have or need those things. We started letting other tenants know. Pretty soon, we had a pretty good bartering system going on. We had a spring and fall free yard sale in the hall. Tenants brought things in and took other things home. This helped with cleanup, also.
6. We felt that a strong sense of community would go a long way to solving the petty disagreements that can seem endless. We set up the hall with a donated computer, a tv/vcr, lots of movies, lots of books, some donated exercise equipment and toys for the kids. Once some ground rules were established it became a great place for the normally unsupervised kids to hang out especially in summer. Rarely did we have to intervene with behavior problems.
I held a once a month “Girls Night Out” for the women. We did facials, foot spas, etc. Our tenants spoke 5 different languages but “girly fru-fru” crosses all language barriers.
And it all worked. It was beautiful to see everyone acting as concerned neighbors, looking out for one another and being looked out after. When we left, they threw a party for us and said thanks for the sense of community we had helped established. I left knowing that we had proved that low income doesn’t have to be low class. I wish we all knew that.
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
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