It’s the last day of 2012. There is always the wonder of what the next year will bring. We wonder especially about a year ending in 13. That can’t be good, right? So, I thought it was a great time to share my philosophy of daily life. It can work for everyone regardless of your faith or circumstances. It has been one of my most powerful tools through the last few years.
It is this- “At the end of the day, all that really matters is that I was the kind of person I wanted to be that day.” It’s deceptively simple. But simple does not always mean easy. At the beginning this can be very hard. Step one is to know what kind of person you want to be. That can be the hardest step for some. Look to who you admire, people who have traits you wish you have. Look at your list of regrets- the “wish I hadn’t done that’s” in your life. Choose to do the opposite in the future.
This step was probably the easiest for me because I want to be a true follower of Jesus Christ. I am lucky enough to have a guidebook and many examples to learn from. In the beginning, many circumstances found me chanting my mantra, “At the end of the day, all that really matters is that I am the kind of person I want to be.” Like when my ex or his wife made choices that hurt me deeply, did I want to lash back and hurt them to ease my pain, oh, yes, I did! But at the end of the day would I be happy with that choice? Nope. So I chose to act as kindly and graciously as I possibly could. The amazing thing is the power I felt over myself and how each time became easier. I was in charge of me- nobody had the power to change who I am anymore because I wasn’t giving them that power.
Part of the reason this works is the already proven method of taking one day at a time. This breaks it down to one event at a time, one moment at a time. I stay in the moment or event and remember who I want to be at the end of the day. It has taken many reactions out of my life and turned them into actions. And I REALLY needed a tool to help me with that.
On my first Greyhound bus trip to Texas last year, I had many opportunities to test this theory. Perhaps the toughest was a confrontation with a young “street” tough woman who got really pissed when my handbag bumped her as I walked down the aisle. Boy, she was PISSED and I really thought she was going to hit me. She stood up and took a stance. I didn’t need my mantra to apologize, that came naturally but I was chanting it in my head as I thought out my choices if she did swing. I was truly ready to stand there while she hit me and do nothing back. Anyone who knew me way back when would know how huge a step that was for me. I didn’t want to fight and nobody was going make me. I didn’t even get angry back. I kept apologizing and talking kindly. She backed down and sat down and I breathed a huge sigh of relief. It was only later that I realized how amazing this moment had been.
There is not room in my blog to share all the experiences I have had with my “philosophy”. They have all been good. I would love to start a movement like the “pay it forward” thing. “At the end of the day” could change the world but I’m satisfied that it has changed me. That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
It is this- “At the end of the day, all that really matters is that I was the kind of person I wanted to be that day.” It’s deceptively simple. But simple does not always mean easy. At the beginning this can be very hard. Step one is to know what kind of person you want to be. That can be the hardest step for some. Look to who you admire, people who have traits you wish you have. Look at your list of regrets- the “wish I hadn’t done that’s” in your life. Choose to do the opposite in the future.
This step was probably the easiest for me because I want to be a true follower of Jesus Christ. I am lucky enough to have a guidebook and many examples to learn from. In the beginning, many circumstances found me chanting my mantra, “At the end of the day, all that really matters is that I am the kind of person I want to be.” Like when my ex or his wife made choices that hurt me deeply, did I want to lash back and hurt them to ease my pain, oh, yes, I did! But at the end of the day would I be happy with that choice? Nope. So I chose to act as kindly and graciously as I possibly could. The amazing thing is the power I felt over myself and how each time became easier. I was in charge of me- nobody had the power to change who I am anymore because I wasn’t giving them that power.
Part of the reason this works is the already proven method of taking one day at a time. This breaks it down to one event at a time, one moment at a time. I stay in the moment or event and remember who I want to be at the end of the day. It has taken many reactions out of my life and turned them into actions. And I REALLY needed a tool to help me with that.
On my first Greyhound bus trip to Texas last year, I had many opportunities to test this theory. Perhaps the toughest was a confrontation with a young “street” tough woman who got really pissed when my handbag bumped her as I walked down the aisle. Boy, she was PISSED and I really thought she was going to hit me. She stood up and took a stance. I didn’t need my mantra to apologize, that came naturally but I was chanting it in my head as I thought out my choices if she did swing. I was truly ready to stand there while she hit me and do nothing back. Anyone who knew me way back when would know how huge a step that was for me. I didn’t want to fight and nobody was going make me. I didn’t even get angry back. I kept apologizing and talking kindly. She backed down and sat down and I breathed a huge sigh of relief. It was only later that I realized how amazing this moment had been.
There is not room in my blog to share all the experiences I have had with my “philosophy”. They have all been good. I would love to start a movement like the “pay it forward” thing. “At the end of the day” could change the world but I’m satisfied that it has changed me. That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
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