Twenty years ago, the parenting advice of the day was giving positive feedback to your children. We were supposed to go to any length to encourage their attempts at anything! If they drew a picture, we were told not to ask what it was of but to tell them how unique and amazing it was even if we had no idea what we were looking at. We were told that any kind of criticism would damage our children’s psyche beyond repair. We were not to damage their creativity by any hint of realty.
I think I’ve found out what happened to those children when they grew up. They all tried out for TV singing competitions convinced that they were the world’s next best thing even if they couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket. Then they end up on Youtube videos of the worst auditions ever.
I watched a number of those videos this past weekend with my daughters. Several things jumped out at me- firstly, I was surprised at how genuinely shocked some of these contestants were to be told they were not singers and secondly, I kept thinking, “Isn’t there anyone in your life that cares enough about you to tell you- DON’T DO IT!”
And while I admit that I used to have a major problem with Simon Cowell’s bluntness, I know wonder how the man has kept from going “barking mad”. I realize that his rudeness is probably his way of trying to cut straight through the years of “isn’t that lovely, dear”. He has even taken on some parents by telling them that they are causing unhappiness by not being realistic with their loved ones.
Of course, you want to encourage your children’s dreams but steer them towards something possible. Support the things they are good at. Help them to find a realistic dream. Everyone is good at something.
One of my sons was a basketball addict. He loved, lived and breathed it while growing up. He was determined that he was going to be an NBA star. I never told him that he couldn’t be one. I emphasized the odds and encouraged him to focus on a back up plan just in case. I did this not because he wasn’t good but because he was a five foot three inch white boy from Maine. His chances were slim.
I also have changed my position on the judges laughing during a performance. Yes, it is rude and unprofessional but they are only human. Some of the situations they find themselves in are funnier than a sitcom. You couldn’t make it up. How do you NOT laugh at times? It doesn’t seem real.
Now I’m not talking about those with average pleasant voices who truly think that with a little help they could be the next best thing. That’s hopefulness. No, I am speaking of those poor people who truly seem to think they have it and what they do have is a “snowballs chance in hell”.
The bottom line is that these shows have been on TV long enough for everyone to have seen how good someone has to be to get to the end. How can some people be so delusional to think that could be them when their singing sounds like cats fighting? So here’s my advice- if you think you can sing good enough to be on TV, go find some strangers, preferably non-drinking ones, and sing for them. They cannot be friends or relatives and you must promise to listen to what they say. Here’s hoping that I don’t get to see you in next years bad audition cuts.That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
I think I’ve found out what happened to those children when they grew up. They all tried out for TV singing competitions convinced that they were the world’s next best thing even if they couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket. Then they end up on Youtube videos of the worst auditions ever.
I watched a number of those videos this past weekend with my daughters. Several things jumped out at me- firstly, I was surprised at how genuinely shocked some of these contestants were to be told they were not singers and secondly, I kept thinking, “Isn’t there anyone in your life that cares enough about you to tell you- DON’T DO IT!”
And while I admit that I used to have a major problem with Simon Cowell’s bluntness, I know wonder how the man has kept from going “barking mad”. I realize that his rudeness is probably his way of trying to cut straight through the years of “isn’t that lovely, dear”. He has even taken on some parents by telling them that they are causing unhappiness by not being realistic with their loved ones.
Of course, you want to encourage your children’s dreams but steer them towards something possible. Support the things they are good at. Help them to find a realistic dream. Everyone is good at something.
One of my sons was a basketball addict. He loved, lived and breathed it while growing up. He was determined that he was going to be an NBA star. I never told him that he couldn’t be one. I emphasized the odds and encouraged him to focus on a back up plan just in case. I did this not because he wasn’t good but because he was a five foot three inch white boy from Maine. His chances were slim.
I also have changed my position on the judges laughing during a performance. Yes, it is rude and unprofessional but they are only human. Some of the situations they find themselves in are funnier than a sitcom. You couldn’t make it up. How do you NOT laugh at times? It doesn’t seem real.
Now I’m not talking about those with average pleasant voices who truly think that with a little help they could be the next best thing. That’s hopefulness. No, I am speaking of those poor people who truly seem to think they have it and what they do have is a “snowballs chance in hell”.
The bottom line is that these shows have been on TV long enough for everyone to have seen how good someone has to be to get to the end. How can some people be so delusional to think that could be them when their singing sounds like cats fighting? So here’s my advice- if you think you can sing good enough to be on TV, go find some strangers, preferably non-drinking ones, and sing for them. They cannot be friends or relatives and you must promise to listen to what they say. Here’s hoping that I don’t get to see you in next years bad audition cuts.That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?
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