Building Bridges

A few months after Brent and I were married, a new grandson joined our family. The following morning my truck driving husband was going to be driving through Missoula, Montana where they lived. As excited as he to meet our new little boy, I made all the necessary arrangements at home and began my drive through the night to meet him there.
I spent most of my trip pondering about our new blended family. Anyone who has been part of a blended family knows the thin ice that everyone gets to skate on as part of the new life experience created. It certainly gives new meaning to the saying, “All because two people fell in love!”
I’ve talked to some people who have strapped on the skates and they all agreed with my next statement. The adult children have a harder time adjusting than the younger children. I have been part discussions about why this is. Most of us find it a little ironic because the adult children brought strangers home, too. They expected them to be welcomed into the family, didn’t they?
Anyway, I’m driving, thinking and praying about my role in this new family. Who am I? How much should I do? Where is the line between reaching out and butting in? How do I establish relationships with people that I know and love already because of my relationship with their dad but also realize that to them I am a stranger? The questions and doubts crowded my mind and heart. How am I going to fill in the gap between us all?
Then, a peace flowed over me as a still, small voice spoke in my mind. It said, “Build bridges.” Huh? “Build bridges”. I came to understand that it wasn’t my job to fill in the gaps. All that I had power to do was start on my side of the chasm and start building.
I pictured scenes of bridge building filed in my head and came to another huge realization. Bridges are built from both sides and joined in the middle at the coming together place! Wow! I was only responsible for MY side of the bridge. I was being told that MY job was to start building. And no matter whether any building was going on across the way- I was to keep building. It WASN’T my job to worry about the other side being built. I was only to worry about MY side.
Since that night I have come to the understanding that this principle is true in all relationships!! I only have to build from my side and stop worrying about the other side! It’s not my responsibility! Some bridges are being built faster than others, some aren’t being built at all but I continue to work on my side building, shoring up, rebuilding when a storm has torn some down, etc.
This has been one of the major lessons in my life. I’m so grateful for the knowledge. I’ve needed it almost everyday since that night.
That’s the view from my side of the street, what’s yours?